We are all familiar with the concept of paying it forward. This blog is a small thing that I can do to try to alleviate some of the stress that occurs during difficult housing transitions.
A bit more than two years ago my husband asked for a divorce. The financial fallout that occurred on the heels of this decision was epic to me. Even being in the business doesn’t help when you are staring foreclosure in the eye.
I had two mortgages (my home and my investment property) that were both in and out of pre-foreclosure for the better part of a year while I attempted to sell on the front end of a recession.
The phone’s ring was acid burning my ears, the mailbox might as well have been filled with vipers. The “help” lines at the mortgage companies were staffed by soulless bots and if I stopped to consider my situation the panic would swell to breathtaking levels.
Slowly, painfully, I made one decision at a time (drop the asking price again, accept the low ball offer, etc.) that started to lead me towards resolution.
I often had to call upon a lesson I learned while skiing in the Alps. I was a third year, very intermediate skiier. I spent the morning riding lifts, cable cars, rope tows and puma chairs up and up and up. After lunch you start back down.
I looked out and DOWN and totally freaked out. My mind churned with frothy panic caps: “I can’t ski this! I will NEVER EVER get off this mountain!” A friend turned to me and gestured that she was about to start down and saw the blind fear on my face.
“Don’t think of the whole thing,” she said. “Pick a point just a little ways from here. Call it our destination.”
So, I picked a grove of trees not far and ventured off to my first stopping point. After arriving there she turned to me, “So that wasn’t scarey, was it?” I shook my head. “OK, so today we are going to ski what is in front of us. Nothing more, just from here to the next stopping point.”
During my transitions from large home to condo and from married mom to single, I would return to that lesson often. The words became my soothing mantra: ski what is in front of you Lesley. Nothing more. Ski what is in front of you and you will get off the Alps.
I share this so that you know that there are people out here that know what it feels like to be afraid of an envelope. Keep breathing, call upon your support systems, return to things that bring you peace in damaged times and remember:
Ski What is In Front of You.
If you need me, I am here for you.
